Humour for Maths Teachers

Suppose there were 20 sheep in a field, and 10 of them jumped a fence; how many sheep would be left?”
“None,” called out little Billy.
“Billy, I’m surprised at your answer,” said the teacher. “Surely your arithmetic is better than that.”
“You may know arithmetic, teacher,” replied Billy, “but you don’t know sheep. If one jumped, they’d all jump the fence.”

Humour for Geography Teachers

Teacher: Joseph, why did you do so badly for your geography exam?
Joseph: Well, didn’t you always say the world is changing everyday – the climates, the coastlines. So I tell myself, “What’s the use of studying until everything has settled down!”

Humour for English Teachers

Mother: Billy, give me an example of a noun.
Billy: A lion.
Mother: Correct. Billy, give me another example of a noun.
Billy: Another lion.

Humour for Discipline Teachers

Teacher: How come you do not comb your hair?
Ah Beng: No comb, sir.
Teacher: Use your dad’s then.
Ah Beng: No hair, sir.

Humour for Home Economics Teachers

Teacher: Gilbert, can you name me the four major food groups I taught the class yesterday?
Gilbert: Er…McDonald’s…Burger King…KFC and Pizza Hut!

Humour for History Teachers

The history teacher was teaching a class on the history of wars, the advantages of world peace and disarmament.
“How many of you class are against war?” she asked. Up went several hands.
“Harry, will you tell the class why are you against war?”
“Because wars make history, and I’d have more to study history and I hate history.”

Humour for Science Teachers

Teacher: What is the formula for water?
Ah Beng: H-I-J-K-L-M-O
Teacher: What made you give a silly answer like that?
Ah Beng: You said it was H to O.

Extracted from
George Ong’s Humour series (Vol 1 -9) – available in The Aroozoo Library